I can’t remember when the inches started to grow in our bed
But I know when I want to shake bad thoughts I sharply turn my head
There is no map of what went wrong
They say that time is a healer but who can wait that long

You’ll always be with me
For better or worse
This is my ancient indigenous curse
Rooting myself in others 
And allowing them to take up my cells
A lesser man would call this a modern hell
But I embrace it
Even when I can’t shake it
Because it’s given me wisdom even though I don’t feel old
It gives me moments of warmth when I will to turn cold

There are many days I wish you both would go away
That I could have that space in my memory erased
But what would I be then
A man less lived among all these lived men
I trace my family tree and find the branch of tragedy
It’s clear it’s who I am
Its compass always finds me

And, the premonitions never cease
I’m not made for peace
My ancestral being knows this fact
That no matter the warfare
My heart can remain intact
So life deals me a bad hand
Because a broken heart can always mend

I’ll travel the world and I’ll see trivial things
They’ll momentarily bring me to you
Like you’re stirring my being
But these things are wrong
They’re fleeting and do not last long
All I have are fragments
That rob me of the present
I’m tired of second hand seeing
And the aching reminders that through my heart
You’re beating

And so

I’ll tell myself every day that leaving was right
Even if I find both of you
When I sit on a beach
(For a moment) in the perfect light